Journey, Part 12

I continued to go to the church here. It took me about a year before I really connected with anyone in the church. We were going to be have a special speaker who would minister to people through the Word of God. I prayed all weekend that God would speak to me, I hadn't felt His presence for a long time. I just figured it had to be because of the way I had lived when I had fallen back into my old ways, and that He must be looking down on me. Even though through my husband God had brought me back to Him, I simply couldn't believe in my heart that I was totally forgiven. Even though in my head I knew I was. The special speaker came and ministered to many people that night, but not to me. I was totally heartbroken. Every time he called someone out, I kept praying it would be me, I so desperately needed and wanted to hear from my God.

Through out the service I kept feeling like I needed to talk to the Care Pastor at our church, and I knew I could leave without talking to her. So I approached her. There were a few people around her, and one of the ladies came up to me, and she said "you know I've been watching you the entire service, and want you to know God is all over you. " At that I began crying and she proceeded to tell me that " He knew you wanted to hear from Him tonight, and the reason that He didn't is that you are very fragile right now, and He's hiding you away and is protecting you right now, that He loves you. " Upon hearing this I began crying all the more, and I thanked her and proceeded to tell her that I really had thought God had forgotten about me. They all chimed in that no He didn't. She gave me a hug and went on her way. I stayed and continued talking to our Care Pastor and was talking to her about my being an intercessor ( for those of you who don't know what an intercessor is, it's someone who has been specifically called to prayer, the intercessors are the prayer warriors in the body of Christ ). She got all excited, and said they were just starting up an intercessory prayer group and she introduced me to another couple who were intercessors. So that started me on a two year journey, where we met once an week to pray for our Pastor, the church, and the body of Christ in our county. It was a great time. There were five of us. One of the ladies and I started getting really close to each other. I would drive her home, and we would have the best conversations. God quickly knit our hearts together. She became my best friend. It had been such a long time since I had, had a really close friend that it felt so good. We began doing everything together, and she connected me to another prayer group that prayed specifically for our county. We met once a week, and had weekly luncheons at one of the leaders house.

It was during one of those luncheons that someone asked us during a teaching they were giving if any of us had been waiting on a promise for a long time. I instantly thought of the promise of healing that I had now been waiting for, for fourteen years. I mentioned that. This person said they thought it was interesting, because the Lord had impressed upon the three leaders to start praying for me for physical healing every week, but they just hadn't been sure about how to approach me. I graciously accepted their offer and that began five month season of them praying for me. Just so you know there were improvements during this time, but not a total physical healing. With that story, begins the very reason I started this blog, I hope you stay tuned. ---Believer